Ontario Man Initially Confused by Thesaurus

John McMillan, native of Oshawa, Ontario was described by his wife Stacy as "confused, at first".

The incident arose as Mr. McMillan was browsing over his lease agreement. Faced with a perplexing string of legal jargon Mr. McMillan reached for the dictionary on a nearby bookshelf, but accidentally grabbed the thesaurus which was located directly adjacent to the dictionary. Mr. McMillan's first reaction was initially to scratch his head in vain confusion, mumbling "what the hell kind of dictionary is this". His wife corrected him, noting that it was in fact the thesaurus she had purchased while in high school. After a brief struggle with the concept, Mr. McMillan soon realized that it was a book of synonyms.

Intrigued, Mr. McMillan retired to the bathroom with the early edition Roget's. According to Mrs. McMillan "Once he's in there with something to read, he could stay in there for hours". After the incident, Mrs. McMillan refused to allow the thesaurus out of the bathroom and it has since become regular reading for Mr. McMillan, "twice a day, three if I'm making my three bean chili", according to Mrs. McMillan.

Reached for comment, Mr. McMillan said "It's a welcome deviation, that book is a thaumaturgical agglutination of antonyms and synonyms! Finally, I can keep pace with the circumambular diction of the lawyers polity, parrying the inexpectation of undue litigation."

PW - All Content 2000.