Why America's Funniest Home Videos is America's Funniest Television Show

By Jason "Bob" Cammor

I don't know why everyone complains about how lousy the show America's Funniest Home Videos is. Man, it's the greatest! Like just last night, I was watching and I saw this dog bite a man in his crotch! His crotch! Can you imagine? I remember another time I was watching and this fat kid got stuck in an inner tube! Stuck! They had to butter him up to get him out! He was stuck!

And Bob Saget? He's the greatest stand-up comic ever! I always laugh when he says "Lock IN your votes" or "LOCK in your votes" or even "Lock in YOUR votes." He says it a different way every time! That's comic genious, people. Once he even said "Lock in your VOTES."

And the way they play their theme song over and over again every chance they get - man, that's super! I can't get enough of that whiney whiney singer. I recorded the theme song so I could hear it every morning at breakfast. It's like she's singing for me!

Whenever I talk to someone, I finish by saying "And Honey, if you're watching..." and add a joke, just like Bob Sagot! People call me "Bob." I even do it when I'm not talking to my wife! It's so funny! I remember once this guy said "That was so funny I forgot to laugh." Can you believe it?

I hope one day I can get bitten in the crotch so that I can be on America's Funniest Home Videos, even though I live in Canada. I got bitten once but nobody filmed it so I hope it happens again. I saw someone from Canada on there once, but they didn't win. They had a film of a dog chasing its tail! Its tail! And the joke was that it couldn't reach it! Ahaha, it's still funny!

Bob, if you're reading this, let me just say that you're the best darn stand up comic ever. Even better than that Jerry Signfeld guy.

RN - All Content 2000.